If God had a master plan.
the next thing i know is we are kissing on the bridge. i have to go one way, he - the ooposite.
i say goodnight and a friend of mine walks me to my house.
i recieve a txt message saying: don't think about what i said, think about what im going to say tomorrow. i will wake up earlier to come to yr basketball tournament to see you play.
The next morning we go to have lunch together after my game. there are other people with us so we can not talk proparly. it's time to go back. we are on the bridg. everyone is saying bey to each other. "see you at dinner!" i say and turn away before he can kiss me. he is disappointed. i can see it in his eyes.
i walk away.
again.
After dinner he says that we have to talk. i don't object.
he says: yo know what i want from you, right? you know what im going to say.
i say no.
he kisses me. i can't resist.
he asks me again.
i say no.
i say: what do you want
he says: this time things are serious.
he talks me in to going out with him. again.
i hate him an adore at the same time.
the next few days are like heaven. we kiss and talk and laugh...
and i think to myself: is this what i wanted for so long, is this what he is like as a boyfriend?
i wonder around thinking if im doing the right thing. no, im not disappointed, im very happy, but why is it that i feel something is missing??? why can't i settle?
on wednsday he gets gated which basically means he isn't allowed out of his room.
i get worried. after the culture that same day we do behind "Media box" where noone can see us but we can hear everyone walk past. i will never forget how long that long, sweet, passionate kiss. there were people walking passed but we didn't care. we had our own little world. we were somewhere far far away.
the next day i broke up with him.
i simply said: you know this isn't working out. you are not giving as much as i am.
it was that something was gng wrong, it's just i could feel he didn't feel the same way that i did.
he was empty. his eyes were empty. his smile was fake.
he said: ok.
and we went our own ways.
i spent an our crying. never have i EVER cried over a guy. never will .
his friend said he was just looking for a relationship and i was just there, liking him so ha desided that it would be good idea to try it out.
of course we talked about it later that day. on the phone. i can;t remember what exactly he said but the point was that we tried and it didn't work.
i sent him a txt the next daying which said that i don't know what it is that is between but it's sad that we can not be together.
his reply was that we are good friends but we always want ore and that we should be greatful for the fact that we are friends.
i knew it was going to end like that. everyone said that he would hurt me. and that i should be careful.
i had to appologise. i didn;t know what i was doing. i thought i could change him. but i can not. he has to mature himself and maybe then he will understand what he had lost.
i say goodnight and a friend of mine walks me to my house.
i recieve a txt message saying: don't think about what i said, think about what im going to say tomorrow. i will wake up earlier to come to yr basketball tournament to see you play.
The next morning we go to have lunch together after my game. there are other people with us so we can not talk proparly. it's time to go back. we are on the bridg. everyone is saying bey to each other. "see you at dinner!" i say and turn away before he can kiss me. he is disappointed. i can see it in his eyes.
i walk away.
again.
After dinner he says that we have to talk. i don't object.
he says: yo know what i want from you, right? you know what im going to say.
i say no.
he kisses me. i can't resist.
he asks me again.
i say no.
i say: what do you want
he says: this time things are serious.
he talks me in to going out with him. again.
i hate him an adore at the same time.
the next few days are like heaven. we kiss and talk and laugh...
and i think to myself: is this what i wanted for so long, is this what he is like as a boyfriend?
i wonder around thinking if im doing the right thing. no, im not disappointed, im very happy, but why is it that i feel something is missing??? why can't i settle?
on wednsday he gets gated which basically means he isn't allowed out of his room.
i get worried. after the culture that same day we do behind "Media box" where noone can see us but we can hear everyone walk past. i will never forget how long that long, sweet, passionate kiss. there were people walking passed but we didn't care. we had our own little world. we were somewhere far far away.
the next day i broke up with him.
i simply said: you know this isn't working out. you are not giving as much as i am.
it was that something was gng wrong, it's just i could feel he didn't feel the same way that i did.
he was empty. his eyes were empty. his smile was fake.
he said: ok.
and we went our own ways.
i spent an our crying. never have i EVER cried over a guy. never will .
his friend said he was just looking for a relationship and i was just there, liking him so ha desided that it would be good idea to try it out.
of course we talked about it later that day. on the phone. i can;t remember what exactly he said but the point was that we tried and it didn't work.
i sent him a txt the next daying which said that i don't know what it is that is between but it's sad that we can not be together.
his reply was that we are good friends but we always want ore and that we should be greatful for the fact that we are friends.
i knew it was going to end like that. everyone said that he would hurt me. and that i should be careful.
i had to appologise. i didn;t know what i was doing. i thought i could change him. but i can not. he has to mature himself and maybe then he will understand what he had lost.
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10.12.2007 в 23:48All You can do is to choose.
Don't wanna press on You, it's only Ma mind. But I think it's Your fault.
,)
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11.12.2007 в 19:56-
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11.12.2007 в 21:44-
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12.12.2007 в 16:08...i thought i could change him. but i can not
...he has to mature himself...
...then he will understand what he had lost